Sunday was moving day. Here's the timeline of how I spent my day:
9:30am - pick up 17ft moving truck from U-haul
10:30am - load truck full of stuff to go to Ex's
1:00pm - drive to Ex's
1:30pm - begin unloading
3:00pm - finish and drive home
3:30pm - talk to friends who live 2 hours away who were supposed to arrive about 5 to help me load my stuff, find out they can't leave until about 4:30, putting them right in the middle of weekend traffic, plus right in the middle of some nasty thunderstorms
3:40pm - eat lunch
4:00pm - run around house packing various loose stuff
7:45pm - guys finally arrive, begin packing truck again
10:30pm - finish and drive to apartment
11:00pm - begin unloading
1:00am - finish unloading, say goodbye to guys, return truck
1:30am - get McDs so I can finally eat dinner and drive car back to house
2:00am - shower
2:30am - load a few other essentials from kitchen, fill coolers with stuff from the fridge
3:20am - drive back to apartment
3:50am - unload car
4:19am - head finally hits pillow
6:45am - "WTF is this alarm making noise for?" (turn alarm off)
7:37am - (waking up again) "Holy shit! I've gotta turn the truck paperwork in by 8am!"
7:59am - arrive at U-haul
8:20am - arrive back at apartment, get ready for work
9:29am - arrive at work
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Time flies when you're busy as hell
I just completed 11 days of vacation and today’s my first day back at work. I wish I could say I had a relaxing time hanging out on a beach somewhere, but that wasn’t in the cards for me. Instead I spent my time packing and preparing to move. Back when Ex and I realized we would be going our separate ways, she moved first, in order to allow Azure to get settled into a new school over Christmas break. Now, it’s time for me to move. I’ve never been more appreciative of having lived in a big empty house as I have over the past couple of weeks as I’ve begun packing.
I’m excited about the new place. It’s just your standard apartment community, but it’s a decent size place, and it even has a sunroom which I can use as a separate play area for the kids to spread their stuff out in a little bit. Plus, the kids and I should be able to take advantage of the onsite pool, and I can hit the fitness room and sauna whenever I want too. Maybe the best thing of all will be that I can take advantage of the free bus pass that my work provides and begin taking the bus back and forth to work, effectively parking my car except for the days I need to do something with the kids. That will be a huge advantage over the 45-minute one-way commute I had previously.
I also just completed six days straight with the kids while Ex went out of town. Her trip was planned before we realized I’d be busy packing during the same week, but it worked out ok anyway. My mom was kind enough to come down for those 6 days to help out with the kids as well as help me pack the majority of my stuff.
In other news, I started seeing someone a few weeks ago, so the very few free moments I’ve had recently have went her way. So as to not tempt fate, I’ll just say that things are going really well so far and leave it at that for the time being.
I’m excited about the new place. It’s just your standard apartment community, but it’s a decent size place, and it even has a sunroom which I can use as a separate play area for the kids to spread their stuff out in a little bit. Plus, the kids and I should be able to take advantage of the onsite pool, and I can hit the fitness room and sauna whenever I want too. Maybe the best thing of all will be that I can take advantage of the free bus pass that my work provides and begin taking the bus back and forth to work, effectively parking my car except for the days I need to do something with the kids. That will be a huge advantage over the 45-minute one-way commute I had previously.
I also just completed six days straight with the kids while Ex went out of town. Her trip was planned before we realized I’d be busy packing during the same week, but it worked out ok anyway. My mom was kind enough to come down for those 6 days to help out with the kids as well as help me pack the majority of my stuff.
In other news, I started seeing someone a few weeks ago, so the very few free moments I’ve had recently have went her way. So as to not tempt fate, I’ll just say that things are going really well so far and leave it at that for the time being.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Life Keeps Moving Along
Not too much going on for me lately, but there has been lots of excitement in the kid’s lives. The biggest news is that Bronze graduated from preschool today. Strangely enough, I’m not feeling the typical “it feels like she was a baby just yesterday” thing that so many people express at a time like this. Instead it feels like she’s had a pretty full life already. Since she was born, she’s lived in 4 different houses, attended 2 different preschools, and just all the general turmoil that happens with a separation.
I can only hope that the commitment to these kids that Ex and I still have will be enough to carry her and her brother through and not have any lasting damage. We’ve all been through a lot lately, but the Ex and I are trying really hard to keep things as normal as possible.
Today, all four of us went to the graduation ceremony together and it was fine. Bronze was too shy to take part in a lot of the activities, but it was still good. This is the same preschool that Azure went to, so we’ve known these two teachers for a long time. It was a little sad to say goodbye to them, as they’ve been so great for the kids.
The other big thing that happened is that Azure lost his first front tooth yesterday. He’d already lost 4 across the bottom quite a while ago, but both front teeth have been loose and he’d gotten excited about it again. It finally popped out at breakfast yesterday.
Here’s a shot of them in the backyard today, Azure showing off his missing tooth and Bronze sporting her graduation cap.
Have a great weekend!
I can only hope that the commitment to these kids that Ex and I still have will be enough to carry her and her brother through and not have any lasting damage. We’ve all been through a lot lately, but the Ex and I are trying really hard to keep things as normal as possible.
Today, all four of us went to the graduation ceremony together and it was fine. Bronze was too shy to take part in a lot of the activities, but it was still good. This is the same preschool that Azure went to, so we’ve known these two teachers for a long time. It was a little sad to say goodbye to them, as they’ve been so great for the kids.
The other big thing that happened is that Azure lost his first front tooth yesterday. He’d already lost 4 across the bottom quite a while ago, but both front teeth have been loose and he’d gotten excited about it again. It finally popped out at breakfast yesterday.
Here’s a shot of them in the backyard today, Azure showing off his missing tooth and Bronze sporting her graduation cap.
Have a great weekend!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Catching up
I'm still having a little trouble getting back into the swing of posting regularly. Unfortunately I got out of that habit. I hope to get better about it soon.
In the meantime, I've been thinking about how much I'd already written previously, so over the next few days?, weeks?, I'm going to be adding my old posts. I've got everything saved as word docs, so it shouldn't be too bad to add them. And just in case I pick us any new readers, it'll give them a chance to get caught up.
In the meantime, I've been thinking about how much I'd already written previously, so over the next few days?, weeks?, I'm going to be adding my old posts. I've got everything saved as word docs, so it shouldn't be too bad to add them. And just in case I pick us any new readers, it'll give them a chance to get caught up.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Driving The Economy
Today as I was leaving work, I decided to act on an impulse I’d been having all day. For one day only, I would pretend that spending my money was ok. It’s never easy for me to part with my money. However, paying for 2 households sort of takes care of it for me each month, regardless.
The thing that started all of it was that I’ve got a work conference coming up Sunday through Tuesday, and I wanted to get a haircut before then. The difference was that I splurged and went to a salon to get my hair cut, instead of just having it cut at the local Fantastic Sam’s (cheap, serviceable haircuts for those who aren’t familiar with them). Then, while I was there, I also purchased some leave-in conditioner, which I was nearly out of. With tip, my total was $53. Comparing this to my haircut I’ve been getting at $18 including tip had me taking a few deep breaths as I paid my bill.
Walking out, I felt good though. I deny myself many times, always just get by with what I’ve already got or take the cheapest route all the time. I felt so good, I decided there was only one thing I could do: hit the mall!
I wanted to get myself some kind of cool new shirt to wear at the conference. Also, I’ve been contemplating starting running, and was thinking about getting some new running shoes. I started out with looking at shoes. As I was trying on some, walking around to test them a bit, I saw a pair of tan casual shoes on the clearance rack that were calling to me. I tried them on and they fit fine, and were only $19.99 too. I left the running shoes behind and paid for my clearance shoes.
As I wandered around, I tried, I really did, but not much was appealing to me. I found a clearance shirt for $2.60, the boxers I wear were on sale, so 2 pair at $5 each, and the big purchase, the new shirt for the conference, was a whopping $13.99. At least it matched the casual shoes I got and could be part of having a new outfit to wear. I even went into the higher priced stores, to see what they had to offer, but again, not much looked good to me. I did see one cool lightweight sweater, but the clearance price was still $56, which even this new carefree me couldn’t justify.
I left the mall, glad that I hadn’t lost all my senses. I decided that I could make do with the 2 pair of running shoes I already own and just wear for everyday use until I prove to myself that I might actually stick to running. So, with the day’s total at just under $100, I figure I’ve done my part for the new few months to keep this economy moving.
The thing that started all of it was that I’ve got a work conference coming up Sunday through Tuesday, and I wanted to get a haircut before then. The difference was that I splurged and went to a salon to get my hair cut, instead of just having it cut at the local Fantastic Sam’s (cheap, serviceable haircuts for those who aren’t familiar with them). Then, while I was there, I also purchased some leave-in conditioner, which I was nearly out of. With tip, my total was $53. Comparing this to my haircut I’ve been getting at $18 including tip had me taking a few deep breaths as I paid my bill.
Walking out, I felt good though. I deny myself many times, always just get by with what I’ve already got or take the cheapest route all the time. I felt so good, I decided there was only one thing I could do: hit the mall!
I wanted to get myself some kind of cool new shirt to wear at the conference. Also, I’ve been contemplating starting running, and was thinking about getting some new running shoes. I started out with looking at shoes. As I was trying on some, walking around to test them a bit, I saw a pair of tan casual shoes on the clearance rack that were calling to me. I tried them on and they fit fine, and were only $19.99 too. I left the running shoes behind and paid for my clearance shoes.
As I wandered around, I tried, I really did, but not much was appealing to me. I found a clearance shirt for $2.60, the boxers I wear were on sale, so 2 pair at $5 each, and the big purchase, the new shirt for the conference, was a whopping $13.99. At least it matched the casual shoes I got and could be part of having a new outfit to wear. I even went into the higher priced stores, to see what they had to offer, but again, not much looked good to me. I did see one cool lightweight sweater, but the clearance price was still $56, which even this new carefree me couldn’t justify.
I left the mall, glad that I hadn’t lost all my senses. I decided that I could make do with the 2 pair of running shoes I already own and just wear for everyday use until I prove to myself that I might actually stick to running. So, with the day’s total at just under $100, I figure I’ve done my part for the new few months to keep this economy moving.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Love, Not Like
When I wrote my welcome back post, I sort of got myself stuck because I immediately started thinking all philosophic about life and what not. I just didn’t quite know where to begin. Thankfully, my daughter, Bronze, had her 5th birthday party this weekend, so I’m going to ease into this again by starting with that.
This was the first party that Ex and I have planned since the separation. Before, the parties were sort of her element. The highlight of a birthday had always been making some sort of a fancy cake though. We’ve had Dora, Cinderella, Blue, etc. Ex has all sorts of cake decorating supplies. We used to stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning the night before each party, her doing the cake, me mixing frosting colors, washing dishes, and hanging decorations. So, since I’ve helped, or rather, witnessed it plenty of times before, I volunteered to make the cake this time.
Ex was glad to let me do it. She planned the party, which was to be an outing at a nearby park, and took care of inviting a couple of friends from Bronze’s preschool class, along with family. I took Bronze to the party store and let her pick out the My Little Pony themed plates, cups, etc. she wanted. We got some My Little Pony pencils, stickers, and bubbles for some of the favors, and I printed out a few coloring pages and word searches to include in the goodie bags as well.
As a kid, my mom would always make really cool cakes for my brother and I. That, combined with the awesome cakes Ex had made, made me feel like I had a lot to live up to. I designed what I thought a My Little Pony cake should look like, how I’d need to cut it, and how to decorate it. I borrowed the decorating supplies from Ex and went at it.
I baked the cake mix, cut it, and got it all laid out on a piece of covered foam board. However, one thing I hadn’t considered was how incredibly difficult it would be to spread frosting onto the side of a cut piece of cake! The frosting just kept grabbing onto the cake and trying to crumble the pieces instead of spreading nicely. I finally came up with the idea to stick the frosting into the microwave so that it’d almost run onto the sides instead of me needing to spread it. Brilliant!
I amazed myself with how well that worked out, so much so that when it came time to do the blue frosting I’d mixed up for the eye and the butterfly, I thought I’d try it again. Except I forgot to consider that instead of having a huge bowl of pink frosting, I was only working with a tiny bowl of blue, so I ended up boiling it. Not sure if anyone realizes what happens to frosting after it’s been boiled, but it sort of crusts into lumps of very hard frosting. And trying to squeeze hard lumps of frosting through a small frosting tip is nearly impossible. I kept having to clear the tip with a toothpick and what should have taken about 5 minutes, took nearly 30! Eventually I managed to get something resembling a butterfly and an eye though. Bronze helped place the licorice hair while I sprinkled on the red sparkles, and it was finished. Bronze said she loved it, which of course made all the effort worth it.
While I cleaned up, Bronze insisted on licking the knives and spoons clean, and I let Azure have a couple too, which they went to town on, getting frosting all over their faces.
After a quick bath for them, we were off to the party store once more for balloons. I had decided to splurge on the giant $10 mylar heart shaped pony one, along with a few pink and red regular ones to go with it. Driving after that was quite difficult, as the balloons took up most of the inside of my car. I’m sure it made for quite a sight, as I was leaned over close to the drivers window, a balloon pushed up against my side, unable to see either kid, only able to get a clear view of the front of the car and my driver’s side mirror. At one point, I even had to ask Bronze if she could see any cars out of her window next to us! I was pretty sure there wasn’t anyone in the next lane, but still, there’s nothing like letting a 5 year old check your blind spot.
We got to the park and the kids took off to play. As I carried the cake to the seating area, the incredibly strong wind was whipping all around me. I went back to the car to get the balloons and just as I got back to the picnic table, a big gust came along and pulled the giant one loose from it’s string. I watched in horror as it swooped down and away, unable to do anything to save it. I couldn’t believe my luck though as the wind carried it directly into the next picnic table over, where it lodged itself safely up against the end of the table, with the seats holding it firmly in place. I ran over and grabbed it, took the entire bunch back inside the car, and retied the string with about 15 knots.
The kids played for a while, then had cake and ice cream sandwiches. Bronze was the last one at the table, as everyone else had finished and went back to playing. Finally she looked up at me and said that she wanted to be done. I said sure. It was then that I noticed that she’d eaten all of her ice cream sandwich and all of her licorice, but only one tiny bite of cake. She said, “Sorry Daddy, but I don’t like the frosting.” I assured her that it was ok, and to just go enjoy herself. I chuckled to myself though, thinking about how just a few hours earlier she’d been licking the frosting off of everything, with a pink nose to boot. Oh well!
The kids had a great time playing, climbing, swinging, and digging while I just enjoyed my time with them. Ex mostly sat at the table with her family, talking etc. while I stayed with the kids. Toward the end, once just the 4 of us were left, she spent 10 or so minutes on the phone with her new boyfriend. I was at the other side of the park, in the sandbox with Azure, while she was pushing Bronze on the tire swing, so I’m not sure who called whom, but either way, it felt odd to me on so many levels, especially watching her tell the kids a couple of times that they needed to wait a minute for her since she was busy on the phone.
Once it was time to go, I went with them back to Ex’s house to play with the kids and try out a couple of the new games she’d got for presents, while Ex’s parents were in the backyard assembling the sand and water table they’d purchased. I didn’t realize it at the time, since I was playing, but they ordered pizza. Once it came, before I even had time to think about it, Ex and her parents started saying goodbye to me. I gave my hugs and kisses to the kids and slinked out the back door while they all sat down to eat together. What a strange feeling. I’m not sure how long until it isn’t so weird, but for now, I just had to chalk it up to another perplexing experience.
It doesn’t matter though, as Bronze had a happy 5th, and we managed to not screw it up with any grown up drama.
This was the first party that Ex and I have planned since the separation. Before, the parties were sort of her element. The highlight of a birthday had always been making some sort of a fancy cake though. We’ve had Dora, Cinderella, Blue, etc. Ex has all sorts of cake decorating supplies. We used to stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning the night before each party, her doing the cake, me mixing frosting colors, washing dishes, and hanging decorations. So, since I’ve helped, or rather, witnessed it plenty of times before, I volunteered to make the cake this time.
Ex was glad to let me do it. She planned the party, which was to be an outing at a nearby park, and took care of inviting a couple of friends from Bronze’s preschool class, along with family. I took Bronze to the party store and let her pick out the My Little Pony themed plates, cups, etc. she wanted. We got some My Little Pony pencils, stickers, and bubbles for some of the favors, and I printed out a few coloring pages and word searches to include in the goodie bags as well.
As a kid, my mom would always make really cool cakes for my brother and I. That, combined with the awesome cakes Ex had made, made me feel like I had a lot to live up to. I designed what I thought a My Little Pony cake should look like, how I’d need to cut it, and how to decorate it. I borrowed the decorating supplies from Ex and went at it.
I baked the cake mix, cut it, and got it all laid out on a piece of covered foam board. However, one thing I hadn’t considered was how incredibly difficult it would be to spread frosting onto the side of a cut piece of cake! The frosting just kept grabbing onto the cake and trying to crumble the pieces instead of spreading nicely. I finally came up with the idea to stick the frosting into the microwave so that it’d almost run onto the sides instead of me needing to spread it. Brilliant!
I amazed myself with how well that worked out, so much so that when it came time to do the blue frosting I’d mixed up for the eye and the butterfly, I thought I’d try it again. Except I forgot to consider that instead of having a huge bowl of pink frosting, I was only working with a tiny bowl of blue, so I ended up boiling it. Not sure if anyone realizes what happens to frosting after it’s been boiled, but it sort of crusts into lumps of very hard frosting. And trying to squeeze hard lumps of frosting through a small frosting tip is nearly impossible. I kept having to clear the tip with a toothpick and what should have taken about 5 minutes, took nearly 30! Eventually I managed to get something resembling a butterfly and an eye though. Bronze helped place the licorice hair while I sprinkled on the red sparkles, and it was finished. Bronze said she loved it, which of course made all the effort worth it.
While I cleaned up, Bronze insisted on licking the knives and spoons clean, and I let Azure have a couple too, which they went to town on, getting frosting all over their faces.After a quick bath for them, we were off to the party store once more for balloons. I had decided to splurge on the giant $10 mylar heart shaped pony one, along with a few pink and red regular ones to go with it. Driving after that was quite difficult, as the balloons took up most of the inside of my car. I’m sure it made for quite a sight, as I was leaned over close to the drivers window, a balloon pushed up against my side, unable to see either kid, only able to get a clear view of the front of the car and my driver’s side mirror. At one point, I even had to ask Bronze if she could see any cars out of her window next to us! I was pretty sure there wasn’t anyone in the next lane, but still, there’s nothing like letting a 5 year old check your blind spot.
We got to the park and the kids took off to play. As I carried the cake to the seating area, the incredibly strong wind was whipping all around me. I went back to the car to get the balloons and just as I got back to the picnic table, a big gust came along and pulled the giant one loose from it’s string. I watched in horror as it swooped down and away, unable to do anything to save it. I couldn’t believe my luck though as the wind carried it directly into the next picnic table over, where it lodged itself safely up against the end of the table, with the seats holding it firmly in place. I ran over and grabbed it, took the entire bunch back inside the car, and retied the string with about 15 knots.
The kids played for a while, then had cake and ice cream sandwiches. Bronze was the last one at the table, as everyone else had finished and went back to playing. Finally she looked up at me and said that she wanted to be done. I said sure. It was then that I noticed that she’d eaten all of her ice cream sandwich and all of her licorice, but only one tiny bite of cake. She said, “Sorry Daddy, but I don’t like the frosting.” I assured her that it was ok, and to just go enjoy herself. I chuckled to myself though, thinking about how just a few hours earlier she’d been licking the frosting off of everything, with a pink nose to boot. Oh well!
The kids had a great time playing, climbing, swinging, and digging while I just enjoyed my time with them. Ex mostly sat at the table with her family, talking etc. while I stayed with the kids. Toward the end, once just the 4 of us were left, she spent 10 or so minutes on the phone with her new boyfriend. I was at the other side of the park, in the sandbox with Azure, while she was pushing Bronze on the tire swing, so I’m not sure who called whom, but either way, it felt odd to me on so many levels, especially watching her tell the kids a couple of times that they needed to wait a minute for her since she was busy on the phone.
Once it was time to go, I went with them back to Ex’s house to play with the kids and try out a couple of the new games she’d got for presents, while Ex’s parents were in the backyard assembling the sand and water table they’d purchased. I didn’t realize it at the time, since I was playing, but they ordered pizza. Once it came, before I even had time to think about it, Ex and her parents started saying goodbye to me. I gave my hugs and kisses to the kids and slinked out the back door while they all sat down to eat together. What a strange feeling. I’m not sure how long until it isn’t so weird, but for now, I just had to chalk it up to another perplexing experience.
It doesn’t matter though, as Bronze had a happy 5th, and we managed to not screw it up with any grown up drama.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Welcome Back
The time has come for me to attempt this once again. For too long, I’ve been hiding in the shadows, still reading a few blogs, mostly through my feed reader, only leaving an occasional comment to let you know I’m still here. Yet like the spring flowers, I find myself being drawn out, wanting to put myself out there again. I have so many thoughts, so many fleeting words and ideas that roll around in my head without an escape. I need to put the thoughts down here, if for nothing else than to clear the clutter that is my brain.
I’ve held on to this domain name for a long while, wondering when it might finally be time for me to talk again, finally be time for me to discuss what it is to be living This Perplexing Life. Now is that time.
Just so everyone’s clear, I’m Delton. I’ve got a son, Azure*, 6 1/2 and a daughter, Bronze*, 5, and a soon to be ex, Ex*, formerly referred to as The Wife*.
Welcome back.
* Not their real names.
I’ve held on to this domain name for a long while, wondering when it might finally be time for me to talk again, finally be time for me to discuss what it is to be living This Perplexing Life. Now is that time.
Just so everyone’s clear, I’m Delton. I’ve got a son, Azure*, 6 1/2 and a daughter, Bronze*, 5, and a soon to be ex, Ex*, formerly referred to as The Wife*.
Welcome back.
* Not their real names.
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